I was talking to someone yesterday and my heart was breaking for her. Her youngest daughter is graduating this year and heading off to college in the fall. Her oldest son left two years ago so for the first time, she’ll be sans kids to mother.
I went through the same thing and didn’t know what to say so I told her I felt the same thing. She was quietly crying. She said “really?” She said “nobody seems to understand what I’m going through.” I could see her trying to hide her emotions. I could see her trying to hide the big lump in her throat and I very well remember when it was me trying to hide the big lump in my throat anytime I though about it.
When I was going through it everyone said to me “this should be the happiest time of your life,” “now you can do whatever you want to.” Well, for all their valuable information, I was doing what I wanted. All I ever wanted in my life was being a mother and now all my work was just, I dunno…done! HUH??? It just wasn’t that simple to me and so I just quit trying to talk to anyone. How could I be the only one that I knew who felt this way? Everyone thought my life would all of a sudden be what? A great big party???
It took me a lot of years and pain to get through that time and that is another post in itself but I did make it. It was hard. So I did all I could and I told her if she ever wanted to talk, I’d be around and she could feel free to contact me and we’d meet for coffee. I remember that last summer I had with Toby and Sue before they both took off in different directions and Jason and Nikki moved to CA…..it was pure HELL and it won’t be anything I’ll soon forget so I’ll be there to help maybe someone who might turn into a better friend.
I’m not that personally involved with this person so if I could see it, how can her friends and family not see it and help her???? Why do people say such insensitive things when your obviously in so much pain?