Trying to hard to find happiness

Do you find that sometimes we look and search for happiness so hard, that we often overlook it?  Kind of like “you can’t see the forest through the trees” type of thing?

There are so many different views on what happiness really is.  Is it being a mother or a wife?  Being a dad or a husband?  Is it having money?  Is it having friends?  Just what is happiness?  How do you know if you are happy?  Is it having “everything” you want? 

Happiness to me is in so many different things.  Watching a blue jay in the bird bath makes me happy.  Having my kitten wake up and need snuggles and kisses makes me happy.  When I walk in the door whether I’ve been gone for an hour or just take the garbage out, my dogs act like I’ve gone to China with their tails wagging so hard you think they’ll snap off, that makes me happy.  To see Trinity and Christoper run across my lawn with arms outstretched yelling “grandma, grandma” makes me happy.  Being able to spend an afternoon with my dad makes me happy.  Having my brother come for the weekend makes me happy.  Having Bailey walk slowly towards me with a rose makes me happy because Bailey can’t act like giving that to me is that big of a deal.  He’s getting to that age.  Can’t act to “excited” to see Grandma but he can’t fool me, he couldn’t wait to give me that rose.  Sitting on the back deck after a long day with my husband makes me happy.  Beating him at darts or Wii bowling REALLY makes me happy!

Just what is happiness to you?  Do you strive so hard for it that your just always looking?  Don’t you think if you have to think to hard, maybe it’s there and your just not seeing it?  Take a break and give thanks to the little things in your life that make your heart bright.  Take stock of the little things that you see that make you smile.  If you can smile when you see something and your alone, don’t you think that’s a happiness?

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25 Responses to Trying to hard to find happiness

  1. SKL says:

    I think I’m pretty happy, even though I can simultaneously be angry, stressed out, or disappointed.

    My version of happiness is just knowing that I’m the amazing person God made me (as is everyone else), that the Spirit of God is within me always and, whenever I can shake off all the “stuff” that usually clutters up my brain, I can merge with the Spirit. That where I am is the perfect place for me at this point in time. That I’m surrounded by amazing people and have meaningful relationships with them.

    I feel happiness anytime I can clear my mind a bit. This happens when I have a moment to sit outdoors and quietly experience nature, or when I spend time with little children, who are so much closer to God and to their real selves than I am. Or just when I remind myself that whatever aggravating detail I’m struggling with isn’t what life’s all about.

    Learning, producing, sharing make me happy. Being on a team that makes a positive difference makes me happy.

    Being appreciated makes me happy. A hug from my wee ones – one of few things I can surely say I “earned” – makes me happy. And the word “mama.”

    Whipped cream! When all else fails, give me something with whipped cream on top, and I’m good.

  2. SKL says:

    This is an interesting question, because the answers will change a lot over a person’s lifetime. I think that, until I was about 30, I didn’t feel right hoping for “happiness”; that wanting more was selfish/greedy and that if I was feeling too comfortable, it was because I wasn’t doing enough for other people.

    One day I woke up to the idea that in order to do right by our creator / sustainer, we have not only a right, but a “duty” to seek happiness.

    I did a lot of spiritual reading and concluded that pure happiness is in all of us, but it’s blocked by negative stuff that we have learned – fear, insecurity, etc. Most of these barriers are unnecessary debris from emotional battles we fought when we were immature. If we work to identify each negative barrier and its origin, we can shake them off one by one. Then we can experience the pure happiness that God intended.

  3. shane says:

    You know what’s funny about this subject, if someone tells you this movie is SO GOOD you HAVE to watch it you’ll watch it and try to find fault with it. Or this is THE BEST SONG I’VE EVER HEARD, someone will put it under a microscope and find anything they can wrong with it. I personally am unhappy a lot more than I am happy. My job is very stressfull and I put up with a lot of crap that’s not deserved and I tend to build that up inside when I should just let it go, but I can’t. Another thing is that I feed off of other people, and I’m sure other people do to. For example that’s say I go golfing with someone and I’m having the best round I’ve had in a while and who I’m golfing with isn’t golfing good and gets pissed off and starts throwing things or swearing that will bring me down as well. Or if I’m at work having a good day which is rare and someone comes up to me complaining it brings me down. If I could find a way to not let things get to me I would be much happier!

  4. Tosha says:

    Happiness comes in many forms and what makes us happy one minute can also make us sad or some other emotion the next. My kids make me happy. They are also to that age where its uncool to do something nice for mom so when I catch them I smile and they say ,”WHAT? What are you smiling at?”

  5. nikki says:

    For me happiness is a lot of different things too. Waking up to Bailey smiling from ear to ear, having our 75lb. Lab weezle her way between us. Hearing my son say I love you just because. Having my daycare boy Andrew, 20 months old, hold his arms out for me because he missed me. Hearing Emily say “auntie, wuv you.” Watching her learn new things. Watching Bailey fish and love it, oh and hearing his stories of his fish that’s THIS big. True fisherman that boy. Jason calling in the middle of the morning, afternoon, and a few more times just to say he was thinking of me:) It doesn’t get much better than this. I have a wonderful son and a husband that actually talks about his feelings. I could go on for days but really the bottom line is the everyday little things make me happy:)

  6. nikki says:

    Oh and he was sooo excited to give you that rose Joy!!! He tries to act all cool and it’s not a big deal about a lot of things…I don’t know who he gets THAT from??!!

  7. Joy says:

    No Nikki, I don’t know where he gets that from either 😉

  8. j$ says:

    bailey knows he’s the shit. He is his fathers son in that respect

    All I’ve ever needed to make me happy is hearing “dads home”. Then the little girl comes out of nicole as she runs and jumps into my arms literally. And when she pretends to strech her arms to the ceiling as to ask for a hug. I love that

  9. Candi says:

    Very Cute Jason and Nicole, lol. How sweet!!!!!!!

  10. nikki says:

    I’m a bird if you’re a bird Jason:) For those who have not seen The Notebook, that movie was practically based on our relationship!!

  11. Sue says:

    Happiness to me is my life right now. I love my family, my job, and my friends. Happiness is accomplishing the goals I set for myself. It’s seeing Trinity dive in the deep end of the pool without a life jacket on and swim back to the wall. Watching Christopher while he “reads” his books or puts puzzles together. Sitting on the deck listening to the quietness. I think happiness is whatever makes your heart feel good and gives you a sense of purpose.

  12. Joy says:

    I love all these different opinions.

    Shane, I think with age, that will change with you. You will learn somehow that other people won’t bother you as much as they do now. I hope so anyway. Just because your dad is golfing in the crapper and throws his clubs, you should “gloat!!!” LOL Darryl!! Just kidding!

  13. Candi says:

    Nicole, I have’nt seen that movie, I am going to go and rent it and think about you guys the whole time.

  14. nikki says:

    You will ball your head off. But it’s a good cry not a sad cry…well sometimes but for the most part it’s about 2 people who just can not physically or emotionally live without one another!! Hands down the best love story Jason and I have EVER seen!!

  15. Joy says:

    I don’t know about that Nikki, I thought that movie was S-A-D!!!!! I felt drained when it was over though I kind of saw it coming.

  16. Smilf says:

    The Notebook is my favorite book EVER. Period. The movie is fantastic as well. The book is way better though!

    I would say I am pretty happy with the little things in my life. I love days where I can sleep in. I love just snuggling up on the couch with my husband. I love when Tyler makes a goal in soccer and comes and almost knocks me over to hug me. I love sitting on my mom’s porch with her just gossiping. I love when the library emails me and lets me know that the book I had on hold is in. Like I said, little things amuse me and I’m pretty happy about that. : )

  17. nikki says:

    I didn’t think it was THAT sad. I thought it was more beautiful than anything. Can’t say too much, don’t want to give it away but who wouldn’t want a love like that??!! I felt drained also but not enough to not watch it twice in one day and the day after that.

  18. Candi says:

    Dont give it away guys, i havent seen it yet, and i want o=to go rent it like now.

  19. Ali says:

    I feel happiness is different to each person. I’m not very material so to me, my happiness comes from my little boy and my family. The little things that most of you have already mentioned, to me are the best things life has to offer although you have to be able to see it. I find some people often look so hard for it that they aren’t seeing it.

    Great post Joy!

  20. darryl says:

    Great question, I tend to be a fairly simple person. Some of the things that make me happy, Sitting in my backyard on a nice summer day having a beer, Nature, Being out on the water, Golf, Watching little ones laugh, Getting a hole in one in golf oh wait that has not happened yet. I’m just happy I have a house a decent car and a good job. I also try to be funny a lot laughter is great medicine.

    Uncle Bologna and Cheese with bbq sauce signing off!!

  21. darryl says:

    I forgot one thing going to Joy and Paul’s for the weekend and golfing and bowling also make me very happy.

  22. Amber says:

    Happiness…. I guess like everything else comes and goes at the moment. It really takes a choice to find the happiness in life. To see and experience all of those things you talk about.

    I love the little things in life….. I strive each day to find the happiness in those things and let the rest just wash away.

    Good post Joy!

  23. Wows… wait … WOW! Love this post, a woman after my own heart I swear it! Something’s you can’t search for only feel and happiness is one of them. What makes me happy? Making you laugh with a mouthful of coffee… ok fine everything, having the people I do in my life, knowing people like you and the others exist… and a freshly baked cookie!

    Fabularse post *bows*

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  25. Jane says:

    I also live a very simple life and take pleasure in the simple things I see everyday. I see animals born as well as die and that part is sad but there is a lot of happiness in what I do. I find a lot of happiness and fulfillment in pretty much providing my family with food that in some way or another we have produced. From our meat to our fruits and veggies. I freeze and can and we eat our stuff all winter. I love that.

    I also find great happiness in my husband and son. Just to see them together or to sit and watch a movie or go fishing. I think if you don’t enjoy all these little things in your life, you are looking way to hard for happiness.

    Great post Joy

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