So, every one has one. The kid next door who always finds trouble. Gets you to do things you wouldn’t do with out his help. Not necessarily the “bad” kid, but someone you just get into trouble with. Why? Who knows? Common sense just leaves when they show up.
I had one. A cousin, lived five house’s to the left. I wasn’t the best kid, far from it. But I never got caught. With him I just didn’t seem to care, as if I could blame him for anything to get out of trouble.
But then we were the bad kids, our neighbors across the street. Toby’s best friend growing up. But according to his mom he would never do that, it was all Toby’s fault.
Bottom line is now Bailey has one. A little boy who’s dad plays softball with me. When they’re together at the field LOOK OUT. I sit and brag to no end how well behaved Bailey is everywhere, to my mom and every one reading this and the one game everyone comes to, I had to yell at Bailey like I never have before. Nutshell is he kept running behind rides at the carnival ( out of sight ). That is not the last picture of my son in my head I want for the rest of my life, him just disappearing behind the port o potty. He knows the rules, he knows the consequences.
It caused me to yell at another team members mom for getting into my business. I didn’t know who she was at the time, or I would have handled it differently. But if you don’t know me, shut your mouth about my business and same goes if you do know me. Unless I’m in YOUR home, keep your distance.
Bailey gets embarrassed very easily, so that was the last thing I wanted to do. But he needs to know I WILL stop playing or whatever I’m doing and handle the situation. I can guarantee it won’t happen again. Believe me, I’ve been told by my mom, she might take me for a walk behind the barn many times!!
Yeah, I had a next-door neighbor who was a few years older and was the “ringleader.” I won’t even confess the stuff she would get us to do. I was rather prudish but if I tried to get out of it, she would show me her fist. She was about twice my size and she wasn’t shy about pushing us around. OK, as you can see, I’m still blaming her for everything!
My kid brother had a friend like that, only they were the same age and size, and I don’t think either one was forcing the other. I think, like you said, they both became stupid and foolish when they were together. It took a while for us to stop blaming the other boy – because there is no way my brother would act like that on his own. Neither would the other boy, or so we heard. The only solution was to keep them apart.
Oh man. Ours isn’t a next door kid, but one who goes to the same babysitter as my stepchildren. He is also on Tyler’s t-ball team and Tyler does things he never would do if this kid weren’t there. It’s insane.
Ours isn’t next door either, he’s a son of a fellow softball player. He is such a cute little kid and he has this smile that says “I’m a naughty little boy” which he gets from his daddy for sure!!! They’re never horrible just more “adventurous” when they’re 2gether. Bailey doesn’t seem to listen as well as he should, he is easily influenced and that is something we are working hard on to improve. Kids sometimes act different with other kids or for other adults. I think it’s normal, and as long as they are not disobeying I don’t have a problem with it. It’s more of a problem when we’re at fields other than our home field…not sure why. New things to explore and they’re are excited about it I guess.
You know, its interesting. My niece has a little cousin who is a couple of years younger than she is. And when they are together they cause mischief with everyone else. However, when they are with me, or with my mother or brother they are little angels. Why? Because they know that there are rules. They don’t even DARE. Simple. Don’t mess with me. Do I yell at them, Nope. Do I beat either one of them? No. I tell them how it is. I tell them the law and I stick to it.
Its good that you stick to it. Your son will learn he can’t push the rules.
Mine was my cousin Michelle. We didn’t live next door, but a few towns away. We would often spend the night at each other’s houses, and in the summer were often inseparable. As little kids it was innocent enough. As middle schoolers we began to get out of hand, and as high school girls my mother finally had to talk to Michelle’s mom (my mom’s niece) and request that Michelle and I no longer see one another unless we were in a room supervised.
(Something to do with being escorted home at 3am by the state troopers…running away from home….sneaking off with older boys who were known to be involved with drugs…I don’t know WHAT her problem was with the situation)
In the end the separation forced us to grow apart and I haven’t spoken to her in years. We’re both married with our own families and thankfully both of us kept ourselves out of the trouble that together we just seemed destined to create.
My daughter Catherine, already as a preschooler as a friend that I don’t care for. It bothers me that already I’m judging her friends because I thought I wouldn’t. The girl’s name is Ereka and she’s older than Catherine by about a year. All I seem to do is hear about what Ereka says about Cat’s clothing, shoes, hair etc, or that Ereka says she needs to come to our house, or Ereka says Cat needs to buy (insert name of movie, CD, toy here that is WAY to old for Catherine). I’ve even already been hit up with the “Can Ereka spend the night at our house?” question as Ereka stood behind Cat staring at me with arms crossed. I don’t like the fact that this little girl plays puppetmaster (I’m sure my daughter isn’t innocent, but I also know that a large portion of this attitude didn’t arrive until Ereka started attending daycare).
I’ll be glad when Ereka starts attending school in the fall.
I don’t think you can ever expect kids to be perfect angels. I think that’s part of being a kid. You push the boundaries to learn it doesn’t mean they’re bad kids, just normal kids. You just have to actually give them boundaries or they will not learn from they’re mistakes. This other boy is usually there w/out his mom, just his dad and h’s playing ball so can’t watch him all the time, so he is probably doing things he wouldn’t normally do either.
Kids are going to be kids, they ALL will test you, no matter what, I have 3, and have the kids next door all the time. Kids are going to act different when they are around certain kids, people and situation. You got ya love em. They are learning, from all of this and it will all be okay. No one or kid is perfect, they is no such things as perfect parenting, if there was life would be boring.
Growing up I wasn’t a follower by any means so maybe that means I was the ring leader? But I can’t recall ever having someone who I was easily led to trouble by.. lol..
Now my kids.. There is 1 little girl down the road that easily leads my girls to trouble. But there is also my own son who is easily the ring leader too.. I’ve told the girls too many times to count htat their brother was going to get them into trouble..
It really would make a great follow up question….Were you (are you) a leader or a follower? Are your kids?
I know without a doubt my daughter is a follower. Despite how bossy she is and how independent she ‘seems’ she also is VERY easily influenced by other children, advertising etc.
My son? Not a follower at all. In fact half of the time he’ll barely give you the pleasure of acknowledging you’re in the room. Most of the time he does his own thing, whatever pops into his little head. As long as his ideas don’t get too far out he’ll be ok.
I am most definatly a leader now, and I was as a child. My children are for sure leaders. Makayla can be a follower at times, but most likley a leader for the most part.
Oh boy, Jeff and Chris. This is so funny. I’m so glad that I’m only hearing now the things you guys used to do while I “thought” you were safe doing something else. Here I thought “I knew it all!”
I was never very brave and didn’t really do many “bad” things but the only thing I could think of that drove other people nuts was with my cousin Pam, we used to giggle to no end and irritated the heck out of our Uncle Glen with it. But later in life, I thought, at least it was laughing. Things could have been much worse.
moms lucky she didn’t know the half of it.
Another good post Jason. I was kind of a chicken when it came to getting “caught” doing bad things so I never really did. My younger brother had one of these friends and his mom always blamed my brother even though they were both guilty. How can some parents be this way? So blind. Kids will be kids so unless they burned down a building or anything really bad, what’s the bid deal?
What did Bailey do? Was he embarrassed? Bravo to you though for doing what you told him you’d do. I’m that way also. It seems hard now but in the end, it’s easier when they’re little. It’s pretty hard to start when they are teens. It has to start now.