I really have to “set the scene” for this one. My daughter in law was going out for dinner for her “once a month dinner with her friends from high school” last Fri. My husband, youngest son, granddaughter (7 yrs), grandson (3.5 yrs) and myself decided to go to the local “Stanley’s” for our supper. The guys had plans to golf the next day and I had plans with granddaughter, Trinity to go shopping at her favorite little shop in town, “Judy’s Cottage” as part of her first communion gift from the previous Sunday.
So, we pile into the Suburban, son driving, husband in passenger front seat, kids each in car-seats with me in between them in the backseat. We go eat our supper and since we were near the golf course, guys want to check the golf cart to make sure it was “ready” for their first venture of the year out on the course. In between the restaurant and the golf course, Trinity had put a piece of bubble gum in her mouth. I was playing ABC flashcards with grandson Christopher and Trinity started to giggle and play with the gum. Pulling it in and out of her mouth and stretching it out with her fingers all the while giggling furiously. So what did I do, I laughed with her. We got to the golf course, took a short ride in the cart, got back in the Suburban and the men thought “since we’re here,” we’ll take the cart to the gas station to fill it with “fresh gas.” Because Lord knows you have to use fresh gas, can’t use gas from the tank in our yard don’t you know!!!
So we were running back and forth. Trinity kept it up with the gum and she was cracking me up to tell you the truth. She was so excited about our day the next day and was delighted in the fact that her dad hated her chewing gum AND playing with it the way she was but he had no idea. It was between her and me. We finally got home after an hour of sitting in that backseat.
So I’m telling my husband about it later that night and I told him how hilarious she was with that gum. In walks youngest son so I started telling him about the whole scene and how funny she was. Well, he didn’t react the way I thought he was going to. He got mad at me. He tells me later that he wasn’t “really” mad but I felt he was mad. He told me that I knowingly let her do something that he didn’t like and what was that telling her?? How was I going to feel when “she was kissing boys” because Dad didn’t like it. HOW WOULD I LIKE THAT????
I was speechless because I never thought of it that way and after a second I said “IT’S NOT THE SAME THING” and he said it was. Was it the same thing or was I just sharing something with my granddaughter?
So I think about this for a LONG TIME while and think, maybe if it was the same thing, is it better that she can come to me and know I’ll love her and she can tell me anything, maybe something she wouldn’t want to tell mom or dad?
I’m at a loss. How do you feel? Was I wrong or were we both kind of doing the right thing??? HELP!!