I’ve seen this topic on quite a few blogs and it was on an afternoon talk show yesterday. Who should your kids give Valentines to?Should they be given to the whole class? Here’s a little article I found on it if your interested.
I feel if the kids are very young, they should give them to the whole class. Some teachers prefer that they not be “To” anyone but the “From” should have your child’s name on it. That way if a child feels “nervous” about giving one to someone they’d rather not, it doesn’t really feel like they are if they just drop them in a box or in bags.
I’m not sure why this is but Trinity (she’s eight) is very….I’m not sure what word to use. She doesn’t want to give any to the boys. She’s brought it up to me twice now. But she says they have to give them to the whole class. I’ve got a couple of theories and the one I keep coming back to is that she must like “one” boy and feels funny giving one to him. You know how kids think. I asked her how she’d feel though if someone didn’t get many Valentines and someone got a whole pile, wouldn’t you feel bad for that kid? If you give one to everyone, it’s more “fair.” She said she would feel bad and she would give to everyone (because she has to).
I know that this “holiday” has really changed since I gave them to my classmates. We took forever to pick out the right “box” and sign them all. I can actually remember sitting at our kitchen table and going down the list and checking the names off as I addressed the cards so we must have been encouraged to give to the whole class too. When my boys were in elementary school, they also gave one to everyone. At least they were told to. I might hear differently now!!
But I do remember one year when the kids sold flowers at lunchtime and since I was the lunch-lady, I was there. Jason bought a flower for a little girl he hardly knew because he felt bad for her because she wasn’t getting any. I know, he was sweet although he doesn’t like the world to know it!! Toby, he wouldn’t waste his money on that kind of thing so he didn’t buy a single one. He just didn’t care.
So this leads to popularity. Is this day all about that? Are we setting up the “less popular” to feel bad? Or should we use this as a lesson about life? That life isn’t always fair and things do happen that we won’t like but we just have to accept things even though “they aren’t fair.”
I don’t mean to sound unfeeling or make it sound like I’m a bad a$$ but I just always felt that lessons come upon us and it might be a good opportunity to explain things like this. Yes, it hurt our feelings but there are many times in life our feelings get hurt but we have to learn from them and try not to hurt others feelings.
I don’t know. How did/do you handle this? Is your child giving to all? To none? Should we protect our kids a all costs and not participate????? What’s you opinion???