Maxine’s Bird Feeder..from Pam


I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed. What a beauty of a bird feeder it is, as I filled it lovingly with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.
But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table and next to the barbecue.
Then came the shit. It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table… Everywhere!
Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket.
And others birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food.
After a while, I couldn’t even sit on my own back porch anymore! So I took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone. I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.
Soon, the back yard was like it used to be… Quiet, serene and no one demanding their rights to a free meal.
Now let’s see… Our Canadian government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, free education and allows anyone born here to be an automatic Citizen.
Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are housing 5 families; you have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor; your child’s 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn’t speak English.
Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to ‘press one’ to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than the ‘Canadian Maple Leaf Flag’ are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.
Just my opinion, but maybe it’s time for the government to take down the bird feeder. .. If you agree, pass it on; if not, continue cleaning up the shit!
Just so you know, I’m not Canadian but Pam is.
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9 Responses to Maxine’s Bird Feeder..from Pam

  1. mssc54 says:

    Maxine is using maximum logic here. STOP IT!!

    Feeding the birds should not be confused with flipping the birds.

  2. SKL says:

    Anytime you give someone something for nothing, they end up complaining because it isn’t more. I really think it hurts them more than it hurts me. But I’m the enemy around here for having such uncharitable thoughts.

  3. javajunkee says:

    ROFLMAO!!! You know I’m all about this one.

  4. chia says:

    honestly, all you americans are immigrants yourselves. unless you’re a native indian, i would dare say your grandparents came from some poverty-stricken European family who came over to rape the land and reap the opportunities in North America. and now you’re trying to claim it your own. don’t forget that most of land in the southern states used to belong to Mexico before they were stolen.

    • Joy says:

      An American didn’t post this. Besides, it’s a joke. What’s with people who can’t take a joke??

    • mssc54 says:

      Mr. Pet (aka Chia) thank you for pointing out that due to the original inhabitants of North America there was much room for improvement and opportunities. My European ancestors waited many hundreds of years to see if the original inhabitants would do anything with the vast resources available. But alass my ancestors finally came to North America and built this great land we now live in. Granted things have gone to hell in a hand basket these last little bit of time but don’t you worry we now have a President that will save all of us! Viva El Presidenta!

      PS: Maxine tried to feed the native birds but they were ungrateful and took advantage of her kindness by moving onto her property, building their own homes and making life for the one who had given them so much miserable. Sadly, because of their ungrateful actions, Maxine was forced to cast the ingrates out. Now instead of a friend who would feed them at her own expense they are forced to return to a life of…. well, who knows where the next free meal will come from. 🙂

  5. Jonas, B. says:

    The original immigrants were not ungrateful vulchers seeking to take whatever they could at someone else’s expense. They did not come to this land with their hand stuck out for some hard working person to fill. They did thier part to make this a great nation. They did not fill excellent halls of learning with grafiti and obscene language, they did not taunt and terrorize their teachers. They had an attitude of gratitude. I don’t see that happening with the new -day immigrants.

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