THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Monday July 28 , 20 09
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM
Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays–Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll–Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?
Group Practice..
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
Class 5
Dinner Dishes–Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM
Class 6
Loss Of Identity–Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups..
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM
Class 7
Learning How To Find Things–Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
Class 8
Health Watch–Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost
Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined
Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday’s noon, 2 hours.
Class 11
Learning to Live–Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife..
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM , location to be determined
Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy–Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 14
The Stove/Oven–What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
LOL. That is hilarious. I could use that school for sure and I think my wife would agree.
Thtas good.Very funny
Very creative. lol
Do they give discounts for volume registrations? ‘Cause there are several men I’d like to pay the fees for!! LMAO!!!
This one started my morning off with a chuckle. Thanks, Nikki!
LOVE IT!!! You just made my day!
Okay ladies . . . Class 9 is our male prerogative. As I live by myself I’ve pretty mastered all the others, but I still hunt in a store for a minimum of a half hour before asking for something. The way I see it, if it’s there, I’ll friggin’ find it!
As for directions, a little pre-planning goes a looooooong way. You’ve got to throw us a bone somewhere–women get to experience the creation of life in a far more profound manner than we can (and no, fellas, orgasm does not count here!) So us driving around for a while is one of the few things we have to contribute to keeping the hunter in us alive (for those of us who live in metropolitan areas). For those who hunt . . . you’re on your own!
Hey, does this mean Nikki’s Back? Welcome back Nikki if you are back from your Vacation.
The first one I was like What? The second one was OK .LOL #14 a quick lesson! Very funny list.
Nikki isn’t back yet Starla. I keep things in storage a long time in advance sometimes. I can’t wait for her to come back.
LOL!That was hilarious…..great start to my day.
ROFFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This was hilarious!
Pingback: And classes for women ….just to be fair « ~javajunkee~