Who here has secrets? We all do right? Small ones, maybe big ones. Secrets we only tell our loved ones or maybe no one. Family secrets of all kinds have always intrigued me. Not only my own but others. Times now have changed so much, more is acceptable, the world itself has changed. Cheating is no surprise anymore, children out of wedlock is not so uncommon. In the early 20’s being unmarried with children was pretty much unheard of! Times are so different now it’s unreal.
Over the last month my cousin on my dad’s side has been studying genealogy and trying to figure out our family tree. Trying being the figurative word here! Our family is anything but normal or tradition.
When I was a child my dad left us. My mom started to date his cousin and ended up marrying him. I have touched on this subject before, my family is weird! There was this man, old man, always around and everyone called him “Uncle Earl” so I did. When I was around the age of 14 or so, I found out he was my biological grandfather who had disowned my father at a very young age. I was too young to really care to find out details about what happened. And when I did ask no one gave me a straight answer. I still don’t know what happened there. I do know now how I got my last name. My biological grandfather is a “Bush” no jokes, 😉 but I was given the last name “Chadaris.” I always thought that name came from the man who adopted my dad, my grandma’s new husband, Bud. I remember him very little. I never thought to ask questions. So when my cousin recently asked if I wanted to be involved in her findings I jumped at the chance. I had so many questions but my father died 9 years ago and there’s no one else to ask. Her finding not only shocked me but some of it was heart breaking.
My grandmother had my dad and Aunt with “Uncle Earl” divorced him and married some other guy before “Bud.” This is where I got my last name. Apparently this man was an alcoholic and very abusive also. They owned a bar together (go figure!). My grandmother ended up having an affair with a very prominent man in that area. Her husband found out and shot them both. Killed the man and wounded my grandmother. He went to prison for 7 years and was never charged with shooting my grandmother. I’m thinking because of the circumstances, she cheated. The bar they owned together was looted and burned down by the towns people. Then she met and married the man I came to know as my Grandpa Bud.
From the early 20’s to the 60’s my family has been involved in owning bars and brothels, committing adultery and even bigamy! I find it all a little humorous! (not the shooting part) It has been interesting to say the least! When I’m in California I am going to the bar and grill that once was a bar and brothel owned by my cousins Great Great Grandfather in the 1920’s. Lots of history there I’m sure!
So in our quest for answers I found out my name comes from some psycho killer that tried shooting my grandmother in her “lady parts!” The good in all of this is it’s not my blood! I may have carried the name “Chadaris” but I do not carry that blood! Bush is my blood. My grandmother’s blood, I can’t even tell you what her maiden name was! More secrets! My Mom didn’t even know about the shooting. She said that family was so hush hush about things!!
So do you have any juicy, scandalous stories to share? Or do you know a family that does? I could write a book, I left out so many details!! I know some skeletons are better left untouched! I more or less had questions I had no answers too. Now some of the blanks are filled in. I would love to dive into my “Bush” family tree but I’m thinking that may be a bit difficult to weave around!