Random Thoughts of the Day:

1) Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

2) I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

3) There is a great need for sarcasm font.

4) How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

5) I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

6) MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

7) Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

8) I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

9) Bad decisions make good stories

10) You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

11) I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

12) I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

13) I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

14) As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

15) I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

16) I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

This entry was posted in fun, funny, humor, humorous, jokes, laughs, laughter, people, things and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Random Thoughts of the Day:

  1. Joy says:

    These are all really good. I really like 1, 3, 10, 11, 13 and 16!! LOL!!

  2. SKL says:

    They are all so true! I can’t even say which ones are my favorites. OK. 1, 2, 5, 6, 8, 11, and especially 15!

    By the way, I know how to fold fitted sheets. For $5 per email, I will be happy to share this valuable knowledge.

  3. Nikki says:

    I like 1, 3, 6, 12 and 15 the most! All are so true and very funny!!

  4. birdpress says:

    LMAO… These are funny! Did you write this? 🙂

  5. Sue says:

    These are really funny because they are so true! No, I didn’t write them, got them from an e-mail and wanted to share 🙂

  6. megan says:

    1. Even worse is when you’re in an argument and you have a fantastic comeback and you forget what it was as you’re saying it.

    3. I second that emotion.

    4. Ball it up as loosely as possible so it won’t get wrinkled, and pray that the cat doesn’t decide to make it her new bed.

    5. Thank goodness for canvas grocery bags. They carry twice as many groceries and don’t cut into the hand quite as harshly as the plastic kind.

    6. I don’t trust MapQuest anymore, after an unplanned trip into Scarytown. Google Maps all the way!

    7. Somewhere in a box with the rest of my great-grandmother’s belongings is the newspaper clipping of her uncle’s obit – complete with long, detailed story about how far he flew when the train hit him.

    10. That moment usually strikes around 2:30 for me.

    12. I hate it when the phone tells me I missed a call and have a new voicemail, but the phone didn’t ring in the first place.

    16. Probably true, but their ads aren’t nearly half as annoying as those incessant “He went to Jared!” commercials.

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