My Promise To Myself

What is the resolution that most people make? Lose weight, become more healthy. For me it wasn’t really a New Years Resolution but more like a promise to myself. I’m going to be 100% honest and tell you how I’ve lost weight in the past.

I didn’t eat! Okay I did, just not till dinner and it wasn’t very much. I exercised my butt off literally for hours a day. I also did it to look better…it nothing to do with being healthy. Obviously…I wasn’t eating! I would get down to where I wanted to be and stop.

I have fought this battle with weight ever since I had my son 9 years ago. I was 118 when I got pregnant, I was too thin but not for the lack of trying. I ate everything and as much as I could. My entire life I was teased  mostly by my family for being so thin. I hated it. So when I got pregnant I knew I could gain weight and I did! I ate everything under the sun. just as I always did. But this time I gained weight and a lot of it. I din’t worry about how hard it would be to lose it after I had the baby. I never had that problem! It never occurred to me!

So now 8.5 months pregnant I weigh 180 pounds! Still it didn’t bother me. I was having a baby, isn’t that what your supposed to do. I ate for 2 literally, probably more like I ate for 4! No one stopped me, no one told me I would have hard time losing it after he was born. I guess I just should have known.

It wasn’t until a few years ago that I really went crazy with the weight loss. I got back down to where I was and stopped. Then I gained some back. It was a vicious cycle I was going through. I’m not sure anyone even knew I wasn’t eating at times. I did this back and forth for a couple years. My weight flip flopped all time.

Last winter I lost 25 pounds in 3 months. Again I stopped once I got to where  I wanted to be. I went all summer not working out, eating whatever I wanted and wouldn’t ya know…it all came back and then some!

Now this winter I have started again! But this time…I put the scale away, I am eating good food and only working out every other day. I would literally weigh myself upwards to 5 times a day. Ridiculous huh?! I know! At one point Jason actually hid it from me.

I’m almost 30, not exactly happy about that but there isn’t a thing I can do about that! I have extremely high cholesterol and heart disease runs rapid in both my moms and dads side. My father died at 49 from a bad heart. I know I need to stick with it. This time I could care less how I look. I am happy with myself as a person, I never was before. This time I care about my health, there’s such a huge difference.

I am not doing this alone now either. I have wonderful friends in my real life that help me by going to walk with me. I have wonderful blogging friends who are going through the same thing. Seeing them, especially Just A Mom, doing it the healthy way has helped me tremendously! Thanks JAM! 😉 Her new blog “As The Scale Turns” is wonderful!!! Check it out if you are going through the same thing I am or you just want to be over all healthier.

I made a promise to myself  I would stay alive to watch my son grow up and watch my grandchildren grow up. That is one promise I won’t break!

I know there are others that do/did what I have been doing for so long. Yo yo dieting. I know now that it’s  never going to make me healthy, actually the complete opposite.

Okay so I was 100% honest with all you…now your turn! 😉 What do you do to stay healthy? Do you do anything? I never thought to think about the future, I am pretty young still. We know we cannot turn back time but you can choose to turn the bad into good. Sooner or later it will catch up to you and for me it has. I was so afraid to go to my annual check up. I did get a tad scolded. For good reasons! My bad…that I will make right!

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17 Responses to My Promise To Myself

  1. SKL says:

    Well, I’m kind of the opposite: I was being really good for like 12 years, and now I am getting lax. During those 12 “good” years, as my metabolism got slower, I gradually dropped most “bad” foods and developed good eating habits – lots of whole, organic, fat-free foods, etc. I maintained a healthy weight, had good strength and stamina, stayed in the same pants size for all those years. But lately I’ve gotten lazy. Well, I had some life changes – adopted a couple of kids, started working 95% of the time just 6 inches away from my bed (and rarely have to squeeze into my work clothes), caught about 50 serial bugs from my kids’ daycare in the past 5 months. So it’s easy to be lazy and tell myself that I’m going to do better tomorrow, etc. I’ve lost the habit of eating fresh fruits and vegetables every day, and started craving “bad” snacks instead. I’m pretty bummed. My age is not exactly helping matters, either.

    I think the only thing to be done is to basically “wake up” and start doing the right thing – re-build those good habits, shake my booty a little more than absolutely necessary, until I get back on track. I was pretty good today (though I am craving something right now!). So it’s a start.

  2. Ellen says:

    I have been eating pretty good almost my whole life, a kind of vitamin Syndrome or so…. Anyway, since I became 50, really, suddenly the love handles and the belly fat are there!! And I can train and train, what i want, it stays where it is! The only bad thing I do, concerning my wait, and it is really stupid, I like to eat after 9.00 PM some chips, crackers and now and then a glass of wine. During the day I can control my gravy for food pretty well, but when we are sitting downstairs, nice and cozy on the couch and watching a good movie, I just forget all my good resolutions and go, without even thinking of them, to the fridge and pantry and get my “food”. Luckily we do not watch every evening a movie 🙂

  3. Laura says:

    I’ve fought with my weight for a long, long time. In high school, I always thought I was too fat, but looking back, I just didn’t know how to dress! Seriously, I was wearing clothes that were too small for me, thinking that I was hiding my curves (ok, squishing them in) – and that’s what they were, curves. I was fit, healthy, active, but had hips, and I constantly operated under the delusion that I was fat.

    FFWD to college, I put on the “freshman whatever” (I don’t remember how much I gained… probably 10 or 15), but then I learned to stress-eat, and emotion-eat, and things just went downhill from there.

    For years now, I’ve been a binge-eater. I started really working on resolving it a year or two before Josh came along, and have been trying to be vigilant ever since. Now, I’m starting to try and incorporate more healthy foods into my diet, as well as vitamins and probiotics.

    We won’t even discuss my life-long, love-hate relationship with exercise. I love exercise when it’s not exercise… ice skating, bike riding, sledding, whatever. I think I need a Wii…..

    But to answer your question, what do I do to stay healthy? Used to be nothing… I’d take my health for granted. But lately, I’ve cut WAY down on soda. I drink water almost exclusively, when I’m not drinking milk or fruit juice with a meal. Josh reminds me every morning to take my vitamin – a multi, an omega-3, and a couple of probiotics. Grilled/baked chicken and fish are staples of our diet now, and we’ve got fresh fruit or veggies at almost every meal. My downfalls are stress reduction, and increasing exercise.

    I also go every single year and have a physical and get my bloodwork done. Not only does it allow me to keep track of the numbers, but it will provide a reference if, at some point, something looks out of whack. It still amazes me that I have to ASK my doctor to do the blood tests, that it’s not just a regular part of a physical. I mean, honestly, it’s a regular part of my DOG’S physical, but not mine? (I feel a rant coming on, I’ll shut up now…)

    • Joy says:

      I would so highly recommend a Wii to you Laura. Paul and I play it every single night while we watch the news. We bowl and it gets us off the couch. I can’t just “sit” and watch TV and we used to play darts but for the last 3 years, we’ve been bowling. We do it for an hour or so every-single-night and without, we’d be on the couch. It’s really fun and it gets you off your butts. Ellen is doing the Wii Fit Plus and I’m almost positive I’ll end up getting it. It sounds really like something I need.

      • Nikki says:

        I want the Wii Fit also or maybe the EA Sports one. I get bored with the elliptical and like you I’d rather do the non work out things to stay fit. Working out to a DVD just isn’t fun for me…I get bored too easily. Bike riding is my very favorite thing to do but that’s just impossible right now. I really can’t wait for summer!

        • Joy says:

          I can’t stand working out to DVD’s or video’s either. Machines also bore me. I’d so much rather bike ride or be doing something outside or swimming or something. ANYTHING that’s NOT exercise!!!

          • Laura says:

            looks like I’m gonna have to start scraping the pennies together. Maybe this time I can use my MyPoints toward a wii…. hmmmm…. (scratches chin thoughtfully)….

  4. Just a Mom says:

    Nikki ~ I can’t say I am doing it the healthy way but I am TRYING! 🙂
    I did the only eating once a day when I was in my twenties all the time actually I think I started that in my teens unless you count the Milky Way & Diet Coke I had for lunch a meal.
    I had a major eye opener a few years ago with my high blood pressure and drunken liver so now I exercise at least 4 times a week with 5 days being my goal. I ride bike and play with my kids. My kids love to hike the canal behind our house so we go for walks all the time! As for eating healthier I need to work on portion control! I have a bad habit of eating really big meals and sweets have become a problem as well. I have done better since I started writing everything I eat down, it makes me think twice before I have that extra scoop of ice cream!

    • Joy says:

      I was just at my doc yesterday JAM and he said a really good reminder of watching what we eat it to write it down. He said you’re less apt to eat if you have to write it down on paper and see it there.

  5. Joy says:

    Oh crap Nikki. I hate to think about losing weight all over again. I was like you when young. I got teased too. It went like this, “Joy Froom skinny as a broom!” I hated it!!!

    FFWD to having kids and just getting lazy. I lost 50 pounds 10 years ago and kept it off for roughly 7 years. After getting sick last Sept and quitting smoking, I’ve gained almost 25 pounds.

    I was at the doctor yesterday for a check up and he’s more worried about my starting to smoke again than my weight but I told him in no uncertain terms that I won’t smoke and I NEED to get some of this weight off. I don’t feel good. So he suggested a place for me to go work out and “do things.” My problem isn’t really with food. I’m lazy and tend to just sit and lay around. It doesn’t help that I’m short of breath either! Isn’t that a good excuse???

    Laura wrote a post too about “resolutions” and stuff so maybe I should too and we’ll post those next week.

    It’s also a lot easier to do this together. I go to JAM’s weight loss blog too. She has some killer recipes.

    • Laura says:

      Hey, Joy…. here’s a thing for you. And don’t laugh out loud until you hear me out.

      Have you ever considered playing an instrument?

      When I was in college, I taught lessons (flute) on weekends. One of my students was a 75 year old firecracker who had recently been diagnosed with asthma. Really bad asthma. She could barely cross the room without needing her inhaler. Well, she told me that she’d always wanted to learn to play the flute, so she signed up to take lessons with me.

      We took it really slow. She was right – she could barely play a single note without having to rest. And the flute is no easy instrument – half the air you blow is wasted because it doesn’t go into the instrument. It takes tremendous breathing control to do it correctly.

      Anyway, we took it slowly. She played what she could – mostly quarter notes (1 beat each). When she needed a break, we reviewed music reading, theory, and fingerings. We just took it slow.

      Eventually, I added “long tones” to her practice – that’s where you hold a note as long as you can, and repeat it over and over. Sort of like weight-lifting for musicians.

      Slowly, she started to improve, and then faster and faster.

      By the time we parted ways, about a year and a half later, she was playing Mozart! I was so incredibly proud of her. She worked her BUTT off. But the best thing was that she had gotten so much stronger. In addition to learning to play the flute, she had been walking. Little bits at first, but then longer and longer distances…


      Ok. NOW you can laugh.

      Or are you thinking about it, just a little bit? 😉

      • Nikki says:

        hey that’s not a bad idea…..Bailey’s playing the recorder right now. They’re super cheap. I think his music teacher got them for like $6 each!

      • Joy says:

        I think it’s an excellent idea. I play the flute all through school. Had I stayed in school, I was looking at the piccolo’s. I should think about that. I think my breathing will also be better if I can drop some poundage.

        • Laura says:

          YAAY!!!! GOOD GIRL!!!! do it… do it… do it…!!!

          If you want (and here’s me jumping in with both feet like I always do…) I can write up some lessons and send you stuff.

          I really think that the thing that helped Anna (my student) most was the fact that she was learning to breathe correctly. Most people only use 1/4 to 1/3 of their lungs to breathe, did you know that? They breathe from the top, rather than taking nice, big breaths all the way down to the diaphragm (the muscle that lays just under the lungs and expands down as you breathe in).

          So, the way to feel if you’re breathing “right” is to lay on your back on the floor (or something else hard, so your back is supported), and inhale nice and deep and slow.

          Did your chest go up toward the ceiling? Or did your belly?

          If your chest went up more than your belly, you’re doing it wrong. Really. You want your belly to expand first, and draw that air in alllllllll the way down, and then your chest expands as your lungs fill up.

          And I’ll shut up now.

  6. Tessa says:

    Thanks for being so open, Nikki. I am so happy for you. Doing it for your health really is the key. I use to be teased for being thin too.

    I think it is easy for all of us to just not think about it, put our health in the back of our minds. I am very mindful of what I eat, of how much I eat, and listen to my body. Sometimes too much!! Sometimes I worry too much, but I am learning to find balance. But I remember you asking me how I am so thin. I thought about this. I grew up with my mom and grandma. Both were obese, and my grandma had 3 heart attacks. She had triple by pass surgery. My mom has high cholesterol and I have spent my whole life worrying about both of them. Mostly my mom because she is only 57 now. I am thankful to God my mom just bought a treadmill and is eating healthy, read Dr. Oz’s great book I bought her and has decided it is about health now.

    I am grateful to have learned young. Eating healthy has always been a priority to me because I have seen what eating unhealthy does, I have always soaked in all the information I hear or read about health, food, ect. With psychology studies, I’ve learned that unhealthy foods also change your brain chemistry leading to mental illness or just a plain bad mood!

    When I was a teen I ate junk, ate whatever I wanted! But I knew once I turned like 23 that had to change. When I was pregnant, I was determined to eat only healthy for the baby and to not gain more than the 30 pounds the doctors told me too. For anyone looking for a kick to eat even healthier, to know how your foods are made, or need a kick to stay away from fast food I recommend the documentaries Fast Food Nation and Food Inc. It worked for us! Just get in your last favorites before watching. Thank you for a fun read as always 🙂

  7. Sue says:

    I think it’s great that you’ve decided to give it a try again and to try something different. I’ve always been active. I played 3 sports in high school and continued to run in college. Don’t get all excited, when I say run I don’t mean 5+ miles at a time! I would run 2 miles and think I was doing great! I am not a distance runner AT ALL! This is one exercise that I really enjoy doing because it’s just me and my thoughts, outside in the fresh air. I did get a treadmill after my son was born and I like that too. I’m all excited now because I’m up to 3 miles!

    I’ve noticed, for myself, that I need to do more to stay in the shape I want to be in. I don’t want to be skinny, I want to be fit. And look fit. I want nice arms and muscular calves and a butt that actually fills out a pair of jeans! The 2 miles I use to run doesn’t cut it anymore. I’ve also tried different videos over the years. Denise Austin seems to be in my library a lot! From aerobics to pilates, pregnancy workouts to dance workouts, she’s got them all! (And I seem to also!)

    The last video series I bought I’ve actually stuck with. I saw it on an infommercial while on call one weekend and HAD to have it! Anyone heard of Turbo Jam?!!! That’s what I got and I really do like it! Now that I think of it, I’ve had it a year and a half. It’s the one thing that gave me a shape instead of just loosing some weight. It toned me up and I think that looks better than just being skinny.

    I don’t work out every day. I aim for 5 days a week and whether that’s all in a row or a day off in between depends on how I feel. I also aim for 40-45 mins (total) a workout. I don’t always get that and I don’t beat myself up over it. I also try and mix it up so I work different muscles instead of the same muscle groups all the time.

    I think we need to remember that not every exercise fits everyone and not every diet fits everyone. You have to find what works for you and have support along the way. I think you found the biggest component of it all though – you’re liking yourself for you and you’re doing it for you. Keep up the good work 🙂

  8. joz1234 says:

    I’m a firm believer in learning how to count calories. Not so that you can withhold food from yourself, but instead so that you learn so well what foods have what calories, that you begin to curb yourself because of your knowledge.

    I lost 10 lbs. last year, and have kept all of it off until a recent miscarriage+Christmas last month. I gained 4 lbs. back. Granted, this doesn’t sound like much weight, but it was several inches and 2 pants sizes for me. I am still in the same pants (my 6’s are really tight now), but I have gone back to calorie counting again.

    I started out with It has a way for you to calculate how many calories you should take in depending on your activity so that you lose the weight in a certain amount of time. It works great!

    Now, once I am in the zone, I don’t have to log on and count my calories. I split the day up. I know I should not eat more than 1000 calories (preferably around 900) by dinnertime. This gives me about 400 for breakfast, 400 for lunch and 200 for a snack. I know a handful of breakfasts that I can eat for that, and a handful of lunches. I eat what I want to…I just make slight changes in them either in content or in portion size so that it works for me.

    For dinner and a snack I have about 800 calories. This is about 600 for a dinner and 200 for a snack. If we eat out, I try to get on the companies website to see what foods are going to fit as closely to my diet as possible. If they don’t have it listed online, I just choose what I eat as wisely as possible and don’t stress too much.

    My biggest advice? Eat whole grains. I eat wheat reduced calorie bread by sara lee, brown rice, wheat or whole grain noodles. Nothing too crazy or expensive, but these small changes fill me up longer.

    we eat out about once a week. I don’t stress over what I eat too much when we do. I just try to not get stuff that’s gonna undo all the working out I do during the week.

    I workout 3 times a week for about 40 -60 minutes. I do 30-40 minutes cardio and about 15-20 minutes freeweights.

    I love doing it now. couldn’t imagine anyother way. When I first started things were much different. I blogged my fitness journey on my blog if you want to check it out. You will see when I started out, I did it much differently and have changed things as I’ve gotten more to a maintenance level.

    Good luck to you!!

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