I really have to ask this question. WHY??? Why on EARTH do we need “bikini jeans”? Because you KNOW, sure as God made little green apples, that these jeans are not going to be worn on the streets of a City Near You by Cindy Crawford and Elle McPhearson look-alikes (and yes, I do realize I’m dating myself, thank you very much. Emma Watson look-alikes. Is that better?).
Nope. You KNOW they’re going to be worn by people who look like Roseanne Barr after a weekend at the all-you-can eat buffet.
According to one article that I read (and yes, there were multiple articles on the subject), these jeans were commissioned by a woman who “wished for jeans that sat lower than her hips but will be snug enough not to require constant pulling up”. So my question is… WHY would you want your jeans to ride lower than the jeans that are already on the market??? The low-rise ones hit well below the belly button as it is. You sit wrong and you’re getting pamphlets handed to you that say “crack kills”.
The real kicker with these jeans is the fact that they are held up by those two little ties on the sides. Which means that some not-so-well-meaning prankster (who, of course, would NOT be me… ) could walk past you on the sidewalk and give your string a little tug, and voila! you’re giving a peep show to the entire town.
Either that, or the moms of the world will constantly be walking up behind you and administering a wedgie, as she whispers in your ear, “pull up your pants, honey, you’re showing your goodies to the world.”
On second thought, maybe these ARE a good idea. I could get a LOT of entertainment out of my next trip to the big city.