1. Domino’s Pizza is bad pizza. It’s the pizza that you get when you’re in college and all you can afford is cardboard with some cheese sprinkled on top. I say this with all the authority of a Chicago Pizza Snob. I know good pizza. Domino’s isn’t it.
2. Cheese is a little bit of Heaven in a chunk.
3. Our government is a back-assed-wards entity wherein the right hand has no freaking idea what the left hand is doing.
I read this article, and then I had to read it again, because I was so flabbergasted the first time through. Why? I have no idea. Nothing in there should surprise me. Not a darned thing. And yet, it did.
In a nutshell, that article (and you can go read it if you’d like your head to explode) explains how the government, under the auspices of the Department of Agriculture has been promoting fat-free milk as a way to lose weight and up your calcium intake. And who doesn’t want to lose weight and fight osteoporosis? Yay, fat-free milk!
But on the other hand, there exists a nonprofit corporation, called Dairy Management, which was created in 1995 by the government, whose sole purpose is to “[increase] dairy consumption by ‘offering the products consumers want, where and when they want them.’” Which is where Domino’s Pizza comes in.
Last year, Domino’s was in trouble. Sales were down, and customers had voted Domino’s as the “worst tasting pies”. Enter Dairy Management. The company teamed up with Domino’s to develop a new line of pizzas with up to 40% MORE CHEESE, and devised and paid for a $12 million marketing campaign.
Yes, you read that correctly. Dairy Management, whose annual budget approaches $140 million, is largely financed by a government-mandated fee on the dairy industry. It also receives several million dollars a year from the Department of Agriculture. That selfsame organization that is operated in part on Ag dollars – Ag taxpayer dollars – paid $12 million to help Domino’s, a private corporation, improve its nasty pizzas. All while the same Department of Agriculture is telling us to eat LESS dairy fat. Because we’re fat.
This is the same government that, on one hand, offer us the Food Pyramid, but on the other, provide the lunches in our public schools which are now targeted as a source of the country’s “obesity epidemic”.
That subsidizes tobacco growers and is currently rolling out a new labeling system for cigarettes, which includes gruesome photos of cancered-up organs.
That taxes cigarettes to pay for things at the same time they’re banning cigarettes because they’re bad for you.
Are we surprised?