Should the same rules apply to boys and girls?

I got into a “discussion” yesterday with my mom about this. She said that boys and girls are different and boys can say no. I said NO teacher should have sex with a student no matter what sex they are and that this takes girls and women back 50 years. To think boys can do one thing and girls can’t?!?! A man doing this is a dirty old man but for a woman to, it’s different? I don’t see the difference.

If one of my boys teachers would have even come close to this, I’d have been loading my gun. I wouldn’t be snickering and thinking “way to go.” That’s sick! Any “teacher” who would consider sex with a student, IN MY OPINION which is the right one, is sick and should never be allowed, in any way, close to or allowed to teach children.

I do feel if someone is under age and they are in a relationship with someone and it’s a few years either way, that changes it for me but a teacher I hold in a higher regard. I feel a teacher is different in that aspect.

What do you say?

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6 Responses to Should the same rules apply to boys and girls?

  1. mssc54 says:

    Actually… I think the penalties for teachers “doing” boys should be harsher. Teenage boys just can’t think straight.

    • Jenny says:

      Really? So should that be an excuse for a male teacher too? They just can’t think straight, so let them off easy?

  2. SKL says:

    Yeah – eew. When I was an education student at age 16, expecting to graduate and start teaching at 20, I could see how that could create temptation for HS students and teachers. And honestly, I would have some sympathy in that case. The teacher would need to find a different job (outside of teaching), but I would not think she was horrible for being attracted to someone within a few years of her age.

    This woman, however, is 31, married with kids, and her job is coaching other teachers on maintaining distance from the students! Hello! No aspect of her behavior was understandable.

    As for the boy vs. girl thing – I agree with you. It should not matter. If anything boys are less mature and less inhibited than girls, so I can’t imagine them being considered more capable of keeping themselves out of a sticky situation. Besides, it may be culturally harder for them to complain that a woman (or man, for that matter) has been hitting on them.

    But I will give your mom one point. A girl student may be more likely to develop a crush on a teacher and be more open to his attentions. But still, we’re talking about the adult’s responsibility to just not ever go there. Both sexes can be victimized, though in different ways.

    I must admit I had a few HS teacher crushes, but none of my teachers ever tried anything – because if they had, they would have been jobless really fast. I heard the 8th-grade band teacher put his hand on a girl’s butt once (on her jeans). She marched directly to the office and reported him. He was gone before the end of the day, never to be heard from (by the students) again.

  3. Nikki says:

    When I was young, this happened to a family friend. A women in her 30’s maybe, was having an affair with a kid who was 16ish. She wasn’t a teacher, though. It was so long ago, I can’t remember the details. But his family was known around town, and my mom and step dad were friends with them. I remember hearing bits and pieces about it, they even went on a talk show. I tried googling to find out when and what talk show but I can’t find anything. I do remember a lot joking and laughing about it. If it was the other way around, would that be a laughing matter? NO! I don’t understand the difference. It’s sick, teacher or not! Male or female….it’s all wrong!

    Small crushes are one thing, but adults should never cross that line, ever!

  4. Jenny says:

    Working with kids you should NEVER cross that line. I don’t understand why its happening more and more. Yes I can see girls having more crushes on teachers but for the boys I think they see it more as an accomplishment. Either way everyone should be keeping their pants zipped!!

  5. Phyllis says:

    This type of behavior is absolutely WRONG! Whether it’s a male or female, teacher or other authority figure (or anyone else for that matter) it is wrong. I, for one, find this behavior reprehensible and feel the adult should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

    What? It’s supposed to be ok because it was a male student? Give me a break! Are we supposed to feel sorry for the teacher because now she is separated from her family and not allowed contact with her daughters? I don’t think so. If anyone should have considered her marriage and daughters it was her! I’m sorry, but very few of us get through life without have a younger person attracted to us. But as adults it’s our responsibility to shut the situation down…..IMMEDIATELY! Especially if the adult finds himself/herself attracted to the child (yes, child, because at 16 most kids, in our culture at least, are children). At 16 most kids are dealing with “raging hormones” to borrow the phrase popular with sit-coms. But at 31 this woman does not have that as an excuse.

    In times past people 16 were considered to be of marriagable age, but that is NOT the culture we live in. At 16, in this culture, most kids are worrying about the next game or cheerleading session, band practice or performance, etc. A lot of them don’t even work yet because families are concerned about their studies and getting into good colleges. There is a tendency to coddle teenagers in this country. Right? Wrong? I don’t know, maybe this can be discussed another day.

    Add in the fact that this woman, intentionally, provided liquor to enhance their time together and it’s worse! This was a act that was planned for, thought out and followed through on. The young man in question probably felt he’d hit the “mother lode”.

    This isn’t really any different than a male family member molesting his female relatives or female molesting her molesting male relatives. The adult brings power, manipulation and brains to the situation. The kids bring trust, love and lack of knowledge.

    “IF CONVICTED”? In my own opinion, there shouldn’t be an “if”, it should read when. I’m thinking being found in this situation wouldn’t be considered circumstantial. She should be made register as a sex offender, because that is exactly what she is.

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