Saving the best

I was watching an episode of Rizzoli and Isles last week and Lorraine Bracco’s character (she plays Angie Harmon’s mom) said “I’m sick of not eating the good candy and always saving it for later. I want to eat the good candy NOW.”

It reminded me of my grandma. We always gave her really nice things. We’d give her candy and nice clothes or sets of towels and she never used anything. She always said she was “saving it for company.” I’ll never forget her. Even when company did come, it was hard for her to use her “good stuff.” I’m a lot like her this way. I have a tendency to put away my really nice things, like my Waterford Crystal or my good dishes and never use them.

Have any of you heard of “Burnt Toast” by Terri Hatcher? In a nutshell it’s about when we become mothers, we start to eat the burnt toast so our kids don’t have to and all the little things we do as women. I recommend this book. I really enjoyed it. But it got me to wondering why women do this? I could see a lot of my grandma’s way of thinking in some of these things.

How many of you are like this? Do you save the best for last or save it for later or do you eat the best stuff first? Do you find yourself giving your kids the best of what you have and you yourself are eating the burnt toast? What do you think makes us this way? If we save everything for “later,” what good is it?

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12 Responses to Saving the best

  1. mssc54 says:

    I don’t mind using or eating the good stuff.

    I remember as a child… Sunday lunch was our Big Meal of the week. We either had roast or chicken. Our dad always ate the neck and wings. It never dawned on me that he was leaving the meatier parts for the other six mouthes.

    Joy, when you eat a meal do you save the best stuff for last?

    • Joy says:

      I’m the kind of eater that I like a bite of each food together. I like everything to “add up” on my plate. I’ll eat meat and potatoes in the same mouthful and will then take a bite of my salad or veggie. For example, if I have “5” bites of meat, I make sure I have 5 bites of everything.

      • Laura says:

        omg, you and my father were separated at birth. we tease him about that all the time!!! He’s NEUROTIC about it!

      • Joy says:

        Oh HUSH. Leave your dad alone. He and me are alike “sock” wise too. I like to keep them in pairs after they’re washed!! Remember??? LMAO!!!

        • Laura says:

          Did you hear that???? It’s very faint. I think… I think…. yep. It’s the “Twilight Zone” theme playing.

      • Ellen says:

        Maybe that is because when you were a child, your mom mashed all food together with some gravy over it? My mom did that and she mixed it with apple sauce (I think that is a Dutch think, it taste nice though, lol) I now eat first my meat and then the rest. And comes to burned toast, Dan always eats that, he loves it! 🙂

        I do not save stuff for later, never done that. I have trouble to replace stuff so when I have new stuff, like towels I replace most of the old ones and keep a few old ones that I will still use. I would love to have new dishes etc. It is still in good shape so I will not buy new one, although the current one is very dull.

      • Nikki says:

        I do the same thing and it grosses out your son! LOL

  2. I think later comes when the old is warn out. Why replace what is still usable. It’s saving for a rainy day. Eating the burn toast is the same concept; why make more toast when there’s already some made. Work harder to make the next two slices better, but don’t waste what you already have. Perhaps it’s even a way of thinking “there are starving kids in _______ that would love this burnt toast”. Everyone wants better for the next generation, but often times all we offer up is materialistic crap and nicer toast. Maybe the toast isn’t the question. Maybe we need to look beyond the toast. 😐

  3. SKL says:

    First of all, I really don’t like “things” and I would rather use an old dish for 100 years than keep getting new ones. I’m not into pretties or goodies or new clothes. I replace things when it would be socially unacceptable to wait any longer. I used to save “new” stuff for decades, but recently I’ve donated a bunch to charity. There’s just no point having all that stuff sitting around gathering dust. It bugs me. So, out it goes, little by little.

    That said, yes, I tend to eat my kids’ leftovers. If they eat 2/3 of the strawberry, I eat the 1/3 that they left. I would eat too-dark toast to spare my kids. I guess I want to feel that they feel well-cared for.

    Now what bugs me is when I get stuck eating all the adults’ leftovers because “we saved it for you, don’t waste it.” I am by nature a light eater, for the most part. But I will stuff myself out of obligation in order to avoid waste. And then when I see something I actually would like to indulge in, I’m like, “No, I just ate 2x the calories I should in those leftovers for lunch.” I guess you could say that I should just not eat food I don’t want, but I can’t just watch food go to waste, at least not if it’s edible.

    Do I save the best for last? Absolutely. I have done that since I was a little kid. No idea why.

  4. Laura says:

    With the little things, like burnt toast, I won’t eat it. I’ll make something for myself that’s just as good. But the big things… I’ll put myself out BIG TIME if it’s to help other people. I’m bad about doing that. It seems like other people’s priorities are always more important than mine, either that or they become my priorities. I can totally rationalize why, too, and make perfect arguments as to why it should be this way – why my preferences just aren’t as important. It’s a bad way to live a life, giving that much of yourself up, and I’m trying to change it.

  5. Nikki says:

    I like to use my new things. I don’t buy new things often, like SKL, only when I need them. So when I get them, they are to be used. I don’t buy things to be put away and brought out for special occasions. I’m way too cheap for that! lol

    As for eating, I eat everything together. I’ll take a bite of meat, salad and bread all at once. I don’t save anything for last, good or bad. If I make toast and burn it, I scrape the burnt part off! I’ve never eaten the kids’ left overs. This book sounds good though!

  6. Karen Joy says:

    I use what I have but I dont think I have anything super good so it all gets used.When its time for something new we buy it and replace the old.I do not like storing alot of things,I cant stand clutter even if its in a closet.I figure I bought it for a reason so why would I put it in storage.
    Now the eating is different.i will always give the company or on a daily basis my hubby the best of whatever it is we are eating.I dont have kids but I will eat the burnt toast before my hubby has too.And I eat a bit of everything on my plate in its turn,but save the best bites for last!

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